It goes too fast . . .
That first year goes by way too fast.
And I am struggling with this fact. My little one is four months old, and those four months went by way too fast. She used to fall asleep in my arms all the time, and every week that happens less and less. When she was teeny, I would look into her eyes, and she would look into mine, and we'd coo back and forth. Now she's too curious to focus that long. Oh, and her tongue. Maybe that is a weird thing to mention, but have you ever paid attention to a baby's tongue? It's so tiny and she would always stick it out. Every time she did, her sisters and I would say, "Little tongue!" and tickle her tongue. Ha ha. Maybe we're a little weird, but cute is cute. Now she does other, more "exciting" things, and she has forgotten that little trick of sticking out her tongue.
Don't get me wrong, I love to see her grow. Every time she learns something new, we are so proud and so fascinated . . . but, it's going too fast. When I brought her home from the hospital, I laid down on the couch holding her on my chest. My hands resting gently on her back. I breathed in and out. Everything in that moment was just me. And her. And the rest of the world seemed to fade away.
And then I blinked.
And here we are four months later. She is amazing. She laughs. She smiles. She loves her sisters with all her heart, and there is nothing better than her four-month-old self.
But I feel like the next time I blink she'll be five.
Blink.
She's going to middle school.
Blink.
She's learning to drive.
Blink.
She's become a woman. Independent. Adventurous. Grown.
And in five shorts blinks, my baby isn't a baby at all.
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Bethany Allen is a family photographer in Southern Utah. She loves photographing children of all ages whether it is part of a family photography session or an individual portrait photography session.